Mixing Helpfulness and Humor Since 2005

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Fashion Tip Of the Day

If you're anything like me, you can't still for more than 5 minutes. And, that's dangerous when in dress clothes. One thing I hate about that combo is that because I'm tall-ish, I find that often my undershirt comes un-tucked leaving a menacing bunching, billowing, buffeting fluff around my mid-section, making me appear frumpy, old, and much like a cotton-headed ninny muggins. I thought this was something I was stuck with for life. But then I had an amazing realization. I thought, "What if I tucked my UNDERSHIRT into my UNDERWEAR?" It's amazing. My undershirt remains tucked in, no frump, no cottony bulge. It's an ALL-DAY fix. Readjust your tuck when using the restroom, and you will stay put all day. Now, I will caution you NOT to tuck your actual shirt into your underwear, because if your underwear rides up, people will see your underwear band and ask, "Dude, do you have your SHIRT tucked into your UNDERWEAR?" This has been tested on boxers and boxer briefs, but obviously "going commando" won't work here.

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7 Comments:

Blogger JCo said...

Your descriptors are great here Jay! Made me laugh out loud to myself - only a few coworkers overheard and wondered how I was amusing myself.

This appears to be a great guy tip (you really sold it Jay), I have reservations about ladies trying this, with our wide assortmant of unmentionables available and all. :-)

03 February, 2005 08:12

 
Blogger Stephanie said...

"Cotton-headed ninny muggins?" Wow...is that regional!? I have never heard such a term, but it certainly is funny!

I'm thinking you have an excellent solution to a chronic male clothing problem. Just remember to tell the men that it's important to zip their fly if they follow your tip--because it's a whole lot more acceptable to have a T-shirt showing when the front door's open than your underwear. ;-)

Now, since I am tall-ish, I have problems with shirts not being long enough, and with the advent of lower-rise pants, that leaves me with my boss pointing out my underwear color anytime I lean over to get anything out of a drawer at work. Maybe someone has a tip for finding good-quality shirts that don't leave you looking like Britney Spears after you've washed the garmet twice.

03 February, 2005 10:44

 
Blogger Jules said...

Steph, if your boss isn't female we have a larger issue on our hands.

03 February, 2005 12:11

 
Blogger Kris said...

Yes, Steph, I believe it is regional, because as another person with herritage in Eastern PA, I've heard the term, just never seen it written out. I have the same problem as you. Being that this is more of a male problem, here's a similar tip for the ladies.
Having trouble keeping your stockings up? Simply put on an extra pair of undies over the stockings once you have them on. You'll notice that there is no more falling down, and you'll be much more comfortable in that dress.

03 February, 2005 12:12

 
Blogger Heather said...

Hey guys! I've really enjoyed these little tidbits of info you have on here. Since it's been mentioned twice now, I thought I'd point out that the "cotton-headed ninny muggins" saying comes from the movie "Elf", as far as I know. There may be areas of the country that use it, but that's the first place I've heard it anyway. Just thought I'd shed some light.

03 February, 2005 13:01

 
Blogger Jay said...

Hi Heather! You're right. It's from "Elf." It's not an original-to-PA slogan, though it may sound as such. No doubt one of the writers from "Elf" was from PA to come up with that craziness. But, IMDB.com point of the day to Heather!!! Now, to address Jen's comment from earlier. I decided to go to Wal-Mart to test this out for "da ladiez." My results will astonish you:

1. Normal "undeez:" Tip Works
2. "Just-in-case-I-get-extra-junk-in-da-trunk" panties: Doesn't work. Too much extra fabric
3. Granny panties: Works
4. Thongs: Only with suspender buckles, or after-market modifications
5. Silky V/S panties: Only with spray adhesive or double-sided tape
6. "Shorty Short Shorts:" Definitely works
7. Girdles, leotards, hose: Tip works

05 February, 2005 01:54

 
Blogger Stephanie said...

Julie,

Thankfully, my boss is female, so there are no larger issues with which to to deal. ;-). With two teenage daughters, she has plenty of gusto for picking on today's fashions (fraught with underwear-showing trousers and britney spears-esque shirts). Aside from wishing we'd find longer shirts and/or higher waisted pants, she and I have had numerous gym locker room discussions/arguments over the logic of thongs (those, by the way, should NOT show at work).

~S

07 February, 2005 07:36

 

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